makayla crist
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PCT | Solo Sobo

Day 13 & 14 | Immobilized

Well, this title is pretty much correct in every way.

First of all, my body hates me. Second of all, the term "slow and steady" is not in my vocabulary. Third of all, I tried to leave the hiker haven, but there were either thunderstorms or walking again -was just not an option. So I sit here, immobilized. And scared.

 

Not going to lie, but the last mile I hiked on trail is something that scared and horrified me. I cried like a little baby and almost broke my body while doing it. Personally, I can't proceed to live in this awful mental hell hole I dug myself into. I miss my friends. 5 months is a long time in the real world, let alone in this world. But there's something calming me. I know I can do it, but it will take maybe the whole trip to get ahold of my anxiety of being alone.

I spent the next two days trying to leave. But couldn't get myself to leave. The girls left day 14. As I watched them climb into the mountains of Steven's pass, a huge amount of guilt washed over me. I knew I should be with them. But I'm not.

I knew I over stayed my welcome at the haven, so I met another hiker, and decided to share a hotel room. It was awesome because we had never met before, and here we are. sharing a small little hotel room together.

I knew in the morning I would start my day with a big dose of PCT trail. So I slept until I couldn't anymore.

Cheers.

XL

makayla crist